by Gina | May 21, 2015 | Leadership, Team Building, Volunteers
If you were to have a moment with any of the people I lead (staff or volunteers) you would learn far more about me than this blog reveals.
Though I know that statement doesn’t shock anyone, I think it’s worth stating. Please don’t be deceived by the ‘me’ represented on this blog. It’s only a part of who I am… as a leader, as a parent, as a wife, as a Christ-follower. It only tells part of the story. And typically the parts that make me look good.
Now that that’s out of the way. Can we get a little ‘real’ here?
I stink at celebrating.
I mean I’m really bad at it.
I’m spending some intentional time asking why I don’t celebrate well… why I move past events, accomplishments or moments of success so quickly. For years I’ve blamed it on ‘drivenness’.
“I’m just driven. That’s in the rear-view mirror. There’s more to do. Let’s charge ahead!”
Though that may be true, the problem is I fail to take a moment to honor those around me who gave above and beyond expectation. I fail to recognize those who brought organization, creativity, clarity, focus or fun to the process. I fail to embrace the people that came together merging their individual talents to create an unbelievable team.
And this failure of mine is too big to ignore. This ‘hole’ I keep stepping in is a hindrance to my ability to lead for 3 reasons:
What’s Rewarded is Repeated
It’s a classic truth that we learned as toddlers… whether we realized it or not. A parent learns that if they want a certain behavior repeated, they reward it. You may not remember your personal potty training journey, but I would suggest that the majority of this reading audience was potty trained using some sort of reward. Do I need to go into further detail here?
Translating such a timeless truth to my leadership context today… when I take time to reward and recognize a great act, I have a far greater chance that act will be repeated. Not just by the person I recognized… but by others around them that want to be recognized too!
[bctt tweet=”Recognition is one of the best ways to re-infuse vision into your volunteer team.”] Recognize those who are doing what you want to see everyone doing.
Recognition Increases Buy In
When I sincerely recognize someone’s hard work… creative idea… extra effort… I gain a little more of their heart. People want to know they are doing a good job. And we help them to know when and how they are doing by recognizing their efforts and celebrating their wins.
The critical part of this exercise is the sincerity. It doesn’t work if you aren’t sincere. If you can’t be sincere… don’t say anything.
Celebration Creates Unity
Celebration creates synergy. Synergy creates momentum. And any coach knows… teams with momentum win. Teams that celebrate increase scores on the scoreboard.
[bctt tweet=”Teams with a culture of celebration are comfortable with elevating and recognizing each other. “]
It’s one thing for the leader to recognize a great job. It’s another level of health when members of the team celebrate each other.
So, here is where you can help me.
[bctt tweet=”How do you celebrate the accomplishments of your team?”]
What have you found successful?
Leave a comment below and help make me a better leader. 🙂
by Gina | May 20, 2015 | My Life
My kids and I made a Sonic run the other day. If you live anywhere near Oklahoma, you know the lure of Sonic Cherry Limeades. Make it “happy hour” and it’s hard to resist. 🙂
Driving back, my two oldest are talking about where they’ll live in college and who they’ll live with. Keegan (10) is patiently explaining to Josie (7) that she’ll live in a dorm room at college and have a roommate. Perplexed, Josie confirms, “Mom, can my roommate be a girl and not a boy?”
The conversation that ensued was comical, at best. I listened as Keegan tried to explain that boys can’t live with girls and girls can’t live with boys b/c that might lead to “making out and other inappropriate things”. I sat at the wheel trying not to laugh out loud.
At this point I stepped in to direct the conversation a little. You see, I want my kids to grow up with a healthy respect for sex. Though I’m a little spooked that my 10 year old understands that there is more to do than just ‘making out’… I’m not going to freak out over it. I’m not going to teach him to fear it. I’m going to teach him to cherish it.
Cherish – (verb) to hold or treat as dear; to care for tenderly
For the next 5 minutes I talked to them about kissing, hugging and other things that married people do to share their love.
But these are only for when you’re married. Why? Because it’s a special gift only for that person. A lot like a Christmas gift. What happens when we open our Christmas gift a week before Christmas? It spoils the surprise! There are special things that are only for your husband or wife. Special gifts that are spoiled if you open them too early… like before marriage. It’s our job to protect and cherish this gift until God brings the right person to receive that gift.
My hope is to set the stage for open dialogue with my kids about appropriate boundaries, healthy perspectives and the gift of sex.
Likely the first of many ‘facts of life’ conversations over a Cherry Limeade. 🙂
How would you explain this to your kids?
by Gina | May 20, 2015 | Uncategorized
This year Kyle and I get to celebrate communion with our two oldest kids. It’s an exciting event. We’ll break bread, share wine (aka grape juice), read from scripture and enjoy a special moment as Christ-followers on Good Friday. What a cool moment this will be.
Things I’m remembering today…
- I (self) was crucified with Christ on the cross
- I (self) no longer live, but Christ lives through me
- When God sees me, He sees Christ… not my mistakes
- The gratefulness and humility that comes when I acknowledge the sacrifice Christ made for me
by Gina | May 20, 2015 | Orange
by Gina | May 20, 2015 | Leadership, Ministry
In some ministry circles I’ve had the opportunity to lead teaching sessions on the topic of confrontation. Though it’s the worst title you can imagine, I’ve always wanted to write a book titled…
The Non-Confrontationalist’s Guide to Confrontation
I thoroughly enjoy this conversation primarily because no matter the context, no matter the size, no matter the organizational structure… leading through conflict is one of the most important things we do.
I believe there are 3 reasons why you would choose to lean into conflict rather than step back from it. And there are 4 steps I use to lead through conflict. I believe everyone can be a better leader by applying these simple steps.
But let’s start with the reasons why you would choose to lean in to conflict.
Reason #1: The Value of Conflict
For years I viewed conflict as something God used to make me a better leader. So every time I opted to step back or shy away from addressing a quarrel between team members, or poor communication between a parent & volunteer… I would internally berate myself for my lack of courage. Then one day God lovingly convicted me. These conflicts weren’t all about me. But I was fighting hard to make them so.
“Could it be (He so gently tells me) that this conflict has more to do with them and a work I desire to complete in them? You can join Me in My work or not. But I am faithful to complete it and will use whomever is willing.”
**Ouch** That one hurt. When I realized that my self-centeredness and tendency toward self-preservation was an active detriment to those around me it was incredibly convicting. I viewed conflict through the wrong lens and that had to change.
Now the value of conflict all comes down to how I view those around me. I begin with the belief that the people on my team, the volunteers in my ministry and the parents I serve simply want to be better… better team members, better parents, better volunteers, better Christ-followers, better (fill in the blank). When I believe that (ultimately) the person in question wants to improve then I can leverage this conflict to help make them better.
Why? Because scripture is clear:
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”
Proverbs 27:17
“…that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion…”
Philippians 1:6
[bctt tweet=”Conflict holds great value in our life because it sharpens us and those around us.”] When we view conflict through this lens then we are more willing to lean into it. God has a way of using circumstances to refine and strengthen our faith. He is faithful this way.
Action Step: Invest 5 minutes and take inventory of the conflict you currently have in your life. Assuming that all parties involved (ultimately) want to be better… list positive outcomes that can result from addressing the conflict rather than ignoring it.
Check out reason #2 for why you should lean into conflict.
