This has to be my favorite podcast to record to date.
And that’s saying a lot in light of the conversations I’ve had the privelege of having on the Orange Kids Podcast.
But our conversation with Ally Evans speaks right to the heart of why I started in ministry so long ago. Because I love connecting with, encouraging and equipping parents to win at being a parent.
Highlights I took away from Ally’s experience:
Equipping for what WE teach isn’t enough
Though many ministry leaders send emails, post on social media, provide handouts and (generally) strive to equip parents for faith conversations around what WE teach each week, this isn’t quite enough. Why?
“What we’re teaching this week in church is probably not what a parent is struggling with at home that week.” -Ally Evans
This is a compelling point. We don’t want to stop what we’re already doing. It holds value. But there is opportunity for more and that part excites me.
Why We Should Listen
For years I was guilty of thinking I understood the challenges parents faced today. I ingested books, blogs and podcasts to keep pace with the current trends of parenting. But the truth is… there are nuanced challenges just within our communities that a nationally published book may not adequately address.
Something I learned in the past few years of ministry is… nothing replaces a simple conversation where you take a moment to say, “What are you facing as you parent today?”
How We Could Listen
There are a variety of ways to listen. As Ally mentioned on the podcast, a private Facebook group for parents can provide a great space for conversation and connection.
I think there are other ways to build on this. A few years ago another ministry leader shared about coordinated phone calls she and her leaders made to parents. I loved it so much, I implemented a similar strategy.
All it required was a monthly plan to:
- Focus on an age group (i.e. Kids ministry = 1st grade; Student ministry = 7th grade)
- Focus on a goal (i.e. only 5 completed calls. The goal wasn’t to exhaust the list. In our world, that was overwhelming!)
- Focus on a question (i.e. What challenges is your child facing in school this year?)
- Offer our help (i.e. How can we help?)
I led the team to focus on these calls for several months. I’ll confess, it was hard to sustain without strong accountability. You get more voicemails than actual conversations. That can feel defeating. And, in light of where we were as a ministry, it was a project I had to back-burner.
But the value of the actual conversations was so high, I wasn’t satisfied to let it go. Despite the daunting volume of potential calls to make. I’m convinced there has to be a way to connect with parents in smaller conversations such as these. It’s just a matter of getting creative.
Maybe that’s a future project. 😉
Equip Leaders to Break the Barrier
I love the idea of equipping a small group leader to simply break the barrier of communication. If you listen to the podcast for long, you’ll hear us talk about challenging small group leaders to introduce themselves. The simplicity of knowing their small group leader’s name makes a parent feel valued. Add one simple question… and you’ve changed the game:
“Is there anything you want me to know about your kid?”
Walking away from this conversation, the question I keep turning over in my head is,
How can we listen and communicate to parents “We are FOR you”?
What do you think?
What have you discovered that helps you listen to parents?
